after moving out of evergreen and returning to the community i've been with for these past three and a half months, it feels as if a week of goodbyes has begun. it feels even more extended then an "irish goodbye" with my family, haha..
i do not want it to end. as i walk around auroville i finally feel that this place is a home of sorts for me. i cannot fully explain the feeling, but i suppose it has to do with finally making connections to people and experiences here and beginning to find my "niche(s)" after months of thinking aurovillians are impossible to crack/get to know a bit more.
just as the door to the amazing green belt in auroville was opened, it feels like it has been closed again very quickly. i am trying to think of it as an open situation- that maybe these aren't final "goodbyes", but it is getting difficult. as i say goodbye to people who have been apart of my growing to love this place, my heart grows very heavy. when i walked to college guest house from evergreen last night, i got this knot in my stomache. i could not mentally process why it was happening, i only recognized the physical reaction in myself. that is when i realized that coming back to college guest house for the last week of this program is just overwhelming. i am fighting to keep myself in the present to enjoy my final days here.
tonight we are having a HUGE celebration with all of our mentors and people we have befriended here. part of me does not want to go because i do not want to experience a huge "goodbye for a long time" type ceremony. i want to leave and say "see you later auroville" because i feel i will be back at some point and it is just too hard to say goodbye to an experience that i will carry in my heart forever right now. i am going to try my hardest to stay positive and make it a "see you in the near future" dinner. it is called a "final ceremony", but it is far from final in my mind.
with that said, i can't believe i'm turning 21 on wednesday. that's so unreal. i plan on going to the beach and then celebrating over "dranks" with people in the community later on. beyond that plan, who knows what will ensue. oh jeez.
this will probably be my last entry before leaving. i am flying into boston on the 21st, then driving down to new jersey on the 23rd. from there i am heading up to montreal for new years. then vermont to find an apartment. then massachusetts to get my "stuff". then back to the green mountains in time for classes in mid-january.
some highlights of this past week:
the traditional indian music concert on saturday night.
watching "mindwalk" (a film) with the people at evergreen.
successfully shoo-ing the rats out of my capsule/room.
climbing the huge windmill at solitude farm.
talking honestly with natasha, amir, and tamar about my frustrations with the deep ecology workshop.
watching steven and lowell make a knife from a car spring using old-school blacksmith techniques.
going swimming at night during the full moon.
going in the ocean at mamallapuram (spelling?) and seeing the temple ruins.
reading "the power of now" out loud to each other at night before we went to bed at evergreen.
celebrating deepam with subash's family by lighting candles and eating dinner at their store.
auroville is a place where philosophy is small talk, forests are as important as farms, and sustainable ideas are just beginning to take root. i feel very grounded here and wish to carry that feeling with me wherever i go from now on.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
"i'm not hugging a tree. you can't make me."
evergreen forest is the best place i've been to in auroville. hands down. and now i get to live there for another week... hell yeah!
and it's not because i have a pimped out capsule on stilts with completely open walls made only of screens (which usually makes getting dressed in the morning rather difficult actually..). and it's not because it houses the world's most amazing bathroom outdoor bathroom. and it's not because it's a beautiful forest just on the outskirts of auroville. and it's not even because the entire place is run on solar power and windmills for water pumps.
it's because of the people at evergreen.
they are some of the most open-minded, giving people i have ever met. my excitement about these people might seem diluted since i have described countless things on this trip AMAZING.. but, for real, these people are AMAZING.
evergreen is forest community that several israeli and english (and possibly other) families call home. there is dave and natasha, amir and tamar, matilde and marc, and shoshana and damien. not to mention matthies, the german civil servant who sleeps above the community kitchen. all are down to talk about anything my heart desires. everyday we talk about everything from french health magazines to what mainstream media feeds our generation in the U.S. vs. Germany. they are all very unique. especially the kids. zozo is about 4 i would say and can build a better bonfire than most people my age. he also runs around the forest naked calling people "asshole" and herding the dogs. mayan is about the same age and can carry on a legit conversation with both 40 year old Tamil men and all of the girls staying. his favorite phrase is "NO WAYYY", which he says with a distinctly euro/indian accent blend that kids pick up in auroville. zia and jasmine are sisters (about 6 and 8 years old) and are two of the sweetest little girls in the world. where they live would have been my paradise as a kid i think. just acres upon acres of forest and countless muddy puddles to play in. they all bring a lot of life to the community.
there are six other girls staying with me in the community. crystal and mayana, two people i have become closer to in the community) live in the treehouse, danielle and laura live in "the boathouse" (a large hut high up on stilts by the back of the forest), laura who has her own hut above the office, and alicia, who is my roommate in the treehouse. all of them are sooooo chill. we've all cooked together, done yoga together in the morning, and worked together in the forest with only minor quarrels popping up.
this past weekend we took part in the community's "convergence workshop". saturday was basically a philosophy camp with dave. we talked about jung's archetypes, des cartes' destructiveness, and environmental ethics in society. sunday was a bit more out there. i mean no disrespect, but i'm not so into hugging trees and doing evolutionary dances as a workshop. we did what is called "the council of all beings", which was created by joanna macy (an american activist/teacher) and some other people. personally, i did not feel it necessary to be told to hug/molest a tree. again, i mean no disrespect because i can see how that works for some people, but i feel like i do not need to do that to appreciate the wonder of that forest. i wake up every single morning in awe of the beautiful cashew trees and other plants around me. i don't think i'm being too cynical or not being open to the process- i think it just isn't my cup of tea. i tried and stuck with it because i truly respect the people who live at evergreen, and indeed i did get things out of the workshop, but a lot of the time i found myself getting frustrated with the process.
this coming weekend we will be taking part in the "systems thinking workshop". my hopes for this workshop is that we will engage in more constructive discussions. i do not want to read and chant for a list of endangered species or speak/represent an aspect of the earth/all living beings in a discussion group anymore. i don't care if it sounds arrogant, but i've been through those emotions before and i'm sure the people at these workshops have as well. i don't need to go through them again in a forced setting. i want to talk about moving forward. i want to talk about positivity amongst all the environmental destruction! that's why we are all here- to move past all the negativity and get down to the real work!
so through all this frustration, i still find evergreen to be a magical place. it's a place where ideas and environmental philosophies count as small talk and community dinners at everyone's amazing houses are a must. so far we've made hummus, veragu veggie stir fries, fruit salads, and other amazing dishes and have been served amazing vegan pea soup, tahini and honey pancakes, and banana, raisin, and chocolate vegan cake by others in the community. my body, mind, and spirit all feel very at home.
p.s. i hope everyone wished Dad a very happy birthday!
and it's not because i have a pimped out capsule on stilts with completely open walls made only of screens (which usually makes getting dressed in the morning rather difficult actually..). and it's not because it houses the world's most amazing bathroom outdoor bathroom. and it's not because it's a beautiful forest just on the outskirts of auroville. and it's not even because the entire place is run on solar power and windmills for water pumps.
it's because of the people at evergreen.
they are some of the most open-minded, giving people i have ever met. my excitement about these people might seem diluted since i have described countless things on this trip AMAZING.. but, for real, these people are AMAZING.
evergreen is forest community that several israeli and english (and possibly other) families call home. there is dave and natasha, amir and tamar, matilde and marc, and shoshana and damien. not to mention matthies, the german civil servant who sleeps above the community kitchen. all are down to talk about anything my heart desires. everyday we talk about everything from french health magazines to what mainstream media feeds our generation in the U.S. vs. Germany. they are all very unique. especially the kids. zozo is about 4 i would say and can build a better bonfire than most people my age. he also runs around the forest naked calling people "asshole" and herding the dogs. mayan is about the same age and can carry on a legit conversation with both 40 year old Tamil men and all of the girls staying. his favorite phrase is "NO WAYYY", which he says with a distinctly euro/indian accent blend that kids pick up in auroville. zia and jasmine are sisters (about 6 and 8 years old) and are two of the sweetest little girls in the world. where they live would have been my paradise as a kid i think. just acres upon acres of forest and countless muddy puddles to play in. they all bring a lot of life to the community.
there are six other girls staying with me in the community. crystal and mayana, two people i have become closer to in the community) live in the treehouse, danielle and laura live in "the boathouse" (a large hut high up on stilts by the back of the forest), laura who has her own hut above the office, and alicia, who is my roommate in the treehouse. all of them are sooooo chill. we've all cooked together, done yoga together in the morning, and worked together in the forest with only minor quarrels popping up.
this past weekend we took part in the community's "convergence workshop". saturday was basically a philosophy camp with dave. we talked about jung's archetypes, des cartes' destructiveness, and environmental ethics in society. sunday was a bit more out there. i mean no disrespect, but i'm not so into hugging trees and doing evolutionary dances as a workshop. we did what is called "the council of all beings", which was created by joanna macy (an american activist/teacher) and some other people. personally, i did not feel it necessary to be told to hug/molest a tree. again, i mean no disrespect because i can see how that works for some people, but i feel like i do not need to do that to appreciate the wonder of that forest. i wake up every single morning in awe of the beautiful cashew trees and other plants around me. i don't think i'm being too cynical or not being open to the process- i think it just isn't my cup of tea. i tried and stuck with it because i truly respect the people who live at evergreen, and indeed i did get things out of the workshop, but a lot of the time i found myself getting frustrated with the process.
this coming weekend we will be taking part in the "systems thinking workshop". my hopes for this workshop is that we will engage in more constructive discussions. i do not want to read and chant for a list of endangered species or speak/represent an aspect of the earth/all living beings in a discussion group anymore. i don't care if it sounds arrogant, but i've been through those emotions before and i'm sure the people at these workshops have as well. i don't need to go through them again in a forced setting. i want to talk about moving forward. i want to talk about positivity amongst all the environmental destruction! that's why we are all here- to move past all the negativity and get down to the real work!
so through all this frustration, i still find evergreen to be a magical place. it's a place where ideas and environmental philosophies count as small talk and community dinners at everyone's amazing houses are a must. so far we've made hummus, veragu veggie stir fries, fruit salads, and other amazing dishes and have been served amazing vegan pea soup, tahini and honey pancakes, and banana, raisin, and chocolate vegan cake by others in the community. my body, mind, and spirit all feel very at home.
p.s. i hope everyone wished Dad a very happy birthday!
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